Revision and rewriting

-       Rewriting is not just rewriting

-       It ‘s rethinking, reconceptualizing and approaching new things.

In media res

Rethink:

Perspective

Structure

(sequence of things)

obstacles

character’s behaviour

actions/ speech

Everyone should at least try and rewrite their stories 5 times

You will never find out what is really in you until you rewrite and rewrite

This doesn’t mean just polishing phrases

TIP

Study your story, see it with a new vision and changed values

Write it afresh

Then maybe scrap it, start all over again – don’t be afraid to do this!

After this, then you can begin “polishing”

Finding expressions with character, dialogue that has rhythm.

It may take 2 or more versions to bring out the full colour of the characters or yourself.

Reflect on this!!

The inclination of the egoist is to get as much as he can, but at the same time not to change.

The final draft

1)   read with a fixed eye

re read through your story carefully

focus on a particular aspect each time, ie, character, location, action, etc.

Ask yourself:

Is the protagonist ALWAYS the focus of the story?

Is he/she doing anything or is everyone else always doing stuff around him/her?

Is he/she even there?

1)   the chainsaw is your friend

now is the time to look at script economy

why have your reader dying to finish after 4 pages when they could be craving for more after 2?

Ask yourself:

Where do my scene begin? Where do they end?

Cliffhanger makes audience want to know more

Can six lines be said in three?

Can I trim the fat? Can I cut the exposition? Can I tell it visually instead?

2)   crank it up!

-the stakes are high – can they be higher?

Would Oh Daesu’s plight be as bad if it wasn’t his daughter he had slept with?

More to lose = more dramatic tension

Does everything matter enough? Can everything matter more?

(Does the situation matter enough to the characters? If it matters more to the characters, the characters will matter more to the audience.)

am I giving my characters hell? If it fun to see them squirm and satisfying enough when they get out of it?

Last week

interactive location

vivid characters

dynamic action

Library

Su alone vandalizing. Library provides a secret location for su to vandalise. 2^nd scene, tess was sleeping. Su left her book there and walk away and left her coat on tess too. The library offers privacy.

Bus

First time they brought out autograph book. Prompt su to bring out autograph book for tessa to sign, tessa didn’t want to sign, su takes it as an offence that su doesn’t want to sign because the bus was shaky because tessa’s tone was really bad.

Field

Public area, everyone can see everyone and who they are with.

Classroom

Teacher and classmates. Su and tess arguing. Su asks someone else to sign her book. Public humilation to let everyone else know.

Staff room

Teacher and sulin. Put it in staff room for privacy issues. Teacher nice, unlikely to reprimand in public.

allowing you to interact with the location

What is a location?

Siberia.

Adilah’s House.

Void deck where Joshua had his first kiss.

What is a location?

A physical place (created or real)

Must allow for events to take place.

The place in your story where events occur and characters interact.

May also represent the “villain” in the story.

What elements make the location interesting? E.g geographical position, climate, rules (spoken & unspoken)

Interactive Location

A setting and surrounding that interacts with the characters f the film by adding impostance to their actions

An environment which impacts the action and heightens the stakes.

Threat if being in the location.

Threat can be manmade or environmentak

Impact of a newly introduced character/ element.

E.g. Norma Rae

Location: Jurassic Park is a zoo/amusement park located on an island off the coast of Central America.

Interactive Location: The island is completely isolated, and anyone on it will be trapped until assistance from the mainland arrives.

We write best what we know well.

DYNAMIC ACTION

Story is action

No action

No interaction

No reason for conflict

Action encompasses any kind of movement, activity and interaction between the characters and also between the characters and their surroundings.

Taking about how one feels is not as powerful as illustrating why one feels hw way they do through action.

Film is behavior.

Action is the manifestation of behavior

The complexity of human psyche and interaction is better understood when its is possible to watch the actions, nuances and reactions of the characters.

Has the potential to enrich the experience of the audience by heightening the stakes and increasing the tension.

MOVING PICTURES

The power of any story lies in the narrator’s ability to project a mental picture for the audience.

Manmade food versus machine made food in the 21^st century- is it sustainable? Manmade food is slow and time/energy consuming, but machine break down too.

Purpose of the exercise

Addresses the problem many newbies have to screenwriting:

How to convey visually any sense of inner conflict of emotion.

Review of Inja

Recall and explain some actions/behaviour that was a result of emotions the characters felt.

Boss

Jealousy, beat up the dog.

Inferiority complex made him want to be the master of the dog instead of Thembile.

Boy

Fear led him to obey the boss.

Love for the dog led him to hesitate killing it to save his boss’ life.

1^st draft of story dye wed 6 jan 2010.

Printed copy in calss. Softcopy on safeassign

Format courier 12, single spacing.

Maximum 3 pages, minimum 2.

• Dialogue reveals character

A character will talk about himself and other people will talk about him.

• Dialogue establishes relationships between characters.

Once you have established your main character’s POV, you can use dialogue with other characters to show that they have other attitudes, creating opposite/alternative POVs.

This helps to create and sustain the element of conflict between characters.

• Good effective dialogue will move the story forward.
• Dialogue communicates faces and information to the audience.

It conveys essential exposition.

Characters will talk about what happened, establishing the storyline.

• Dialogue comments on the action.
• Dialogue ties the script together.

It is one of the devices that YOU as a writer can use to expand and enlarge your characters.

“If you can see it or hear it, don’t write it,” – Neville Smith.

• Dialogue should be used sparingly.
• NEVER TELL AUDIENCE WHAT THEY CAN SEE FOR THEMSELVES.
• Dialogue is no substitute for action.

In Hollywood when they look at a page and it’s got too much vlack, to much ink on the paper, they say: “SHIT! IT’S FREEZE THE CAMERA TIME!!!”

• Common mistake

Students sometimes never achieve a level of competence as they tend to reproduce conventional spoken language, long statements of “REAL TALKING”, and defend their decision by telling us that.

Students tend to create radio shows with images.

Redifusion.

FILM IS A VISUAL MEDIUM.

A SCREENPLAY IS A STORY TOLD IN PICTURES.

“It’s how the character speaks.”

Consider the age, education, race, background, gender and religion of the character.

• Good dialogue is not somebody’s ability to write authentic speech as heard in real life.

Bad dialogue: cheesy, unfocused, inappropriate tone or language, long winded.

If that was all there is to it, you can just push a button on the tape recorder and then go collect your Oscar.

• Good dialogue is the illusion of reality.

You’ve got to know how to edit what people say without losing any of the spirit.

True story not necessarily good story

True life stories do not offer neat and relevant endings

Life is unpredictable

In a story we can and must control the events and sequences so that it gives the appearance of being like life.

Every story starts with a character. The character is the heart, the soul, and the nervous system. It is through your characters that the viewers experience emotions.

DEFINING THE CHARACTER

Without a character, there is no action.

Without action, you have no conflict.

Without conflict, you have no story.

Without story, you have no screenplay.

When developing a character, ask yourself:

Who is your character?

What does he want?

What is his quest?

What drives him to the resolution of the story?

1. Establish your main character.

Characters should have a 3 dimensional structure.

a)    Physiology

Sex

Age

Height, weight

Colour of hair, eyes, skin

Posture

Appearance

Defects, abnormalities, deformities, birthmarks, diseases.

Hereditary

b)   Sociology

Class (lower, middle, upper)

Occupation: type of work, hours of work, income, condition of work, attitude towards organization, suitability for work

Education amount, kind of school, marks, favourite subjects, poorest subjects, aptitudes

Home life: parents living, earning power, orphan, parents separated / divorced, parents’ habits, parents’ mental development, parents’ vices, neglect, character’s marital status.

c)    Psychology

Religion

Race, Nationality

Place in the Community; leader among friends, clubs, sports

Political affliations

Amusements: hobbies, books, newspapers, magazines he/she reads

Sex life, moral standards

Personal premise, ambition

Frustrations, chief disappointments

Temperament: choleric, easy-going, pessimistic, optimistic

Attitude towards life: resigned, militant, defeatist

Complexes: obsessions, inhibitions, superstitions, phobias

Personality: extrovert, introvert

Abilities: language, talents

Qualities: imagination, judgment, taste, poise

I.Q., E.Q.

What is the deep and personal secret this character has which he is desperate to protect/hide?

1. separate the components of his life into 2 basic categories

a) interior

The interior life takes place from birth unti the moment your stories begin.

It is a process that forms character. [when you start formulating your character from birth, you see your character build in body and form]

-how old is he when the story begins?

-where does he live?

-does he have siblings?

-what kind of childhood does he have?

-what was his relationship to his parents?

-what kind of child was he?

-is he married, single, widowed, separated or divorced?

b) exterior

it is process that reveals character.

-who are they and what do they do?

are they sad or happy with their life?

do they wish their life was different? another job? another wife?

You must create your characters in relationship to other people or things.

All dramatic characters interact in 3 ways:

1.they EXPERIENCE CONFLICT in achieving their dramatic need.

[eg, Need money - Rob and bank, rob a store, rob a person?]

2. They INTERACT with other CHARACTERS.

[Either in an antagonistuc, friendly, or indifferent way]

3. They INTERACT with THEMSELVES

[eg, He overcame his fear of being caught by pulling off the robbery successfully]

How do you invent characters?

-try turning them upset down.

A monk who is devoted to his religion… but is a football fanatic.

A serial killer… whose obsession is to kill other serial killers.

A common street rat… who loves to eat and cook only fine food.

Jealousy-> death threat

Rage-> violence

Impulsiveness-> misunderstanding

Gullible->

Too kind-> being taken advantage of

Trustworthy-> being taken advantage of

Letter to the past

Sparked off

-       event/person

-       reflect on emotions then/now

most time you wanted to know/say

mostly due to fear of confrontation

having to deal with situation

revisit the past

Purpose of the excerise

the letter is a practical, personal example of how a character- you- undergo an inevitable process of change.

This process of change is an essential ingredient of any effective story.

In dramatic writing, the very essence is character change.

A storyteller should be concerned with the potential of every experience.

Everything about you- where you were born, what food you eat, the bump on your forehead – your experiences are unique and irreplaceable.

Many of your experiences are universal and translatable and can be used in any location.

Translatable ideas

-       visit to hospital

-       fear of going to dentist

-       falling in love

-       ghost stories (fear)

-       death

Storytelling tool 2: experience

Tip:

if you don’t know what to do with a character, make him yourself for a while.

See how he relates to the world he has been thrown into.

Plunder your own personal background! (the things that happen to you as you grow up and the things that are currently happening to you make terrific story sources.)

Record experiences (diary, blog, etc.)

Reflect your past (colourful past)

Recall how you felt then and now.

All people have fragments of stories

These potential ideas prompt your desire to know more

Respond emotionally and intellectually to what you heard

Good stories are born in the heart, not the head.

Initial ideas sparked by emotions and memories (heart)

Development stage (head)

Remember the role of an audience

After all, you ARE the audience.

Take audience on a ride of discovery.

Storytelling tool 3: memory

Your memory is a wonderful cabinet of past incidents which you have experienced or been told.

These memories are points of reference to your own past existence

Write what you do not know because you will find some part of you that does know.

Imagination, research, interviews

What is the difference between memory and experience?

Observation, experience, memory. Learn from it (what you REALLY go through) (manufactured. What you remember.)

How do we use memory to build creative content?



1.  Who is Aristotle?

He was a Greek philosopher.

2.  When and where did Aristotle live?

Greece, 384 – 322 B.C

3.  What was Aristotle’s Poetics?

He taught that Poetry should be divided into 3 genres – tragedy, comedy and epic.

Poetics focuses on tragedy.

4.  What is the definition of Greek tragedy?

Tragedy is the ‘imitation of an action’ according to the law of probability or necessity’

Group B:

1.  Explain Aristotle’s 6 required parts of a tragedy?

Plot, Character, Thought, Diction, Song/Melody, Spectacl

2.  What is the “cause-and-effect” chain?

Reveals what MAY happen.

3.  How can a good plot create a “unity of action”?

‘Arrangement of incidents’, not the story itself but the way the incidents are presented to the audience.

4.  Definition of mimesis: Imitation/Representation

Group C:

1. Aristotle thought episodic plots were the worst kind of storytelling. What is an episodic plot and why did Aristotle think this way?

Episodic plots only concentrate on random and unrelated incidents that happen to a character.

1. What is an example of a movie or a play that follows Aristotle’s definition of tragedy? Explain your selection.

1. Definition of katharsis: Purification/Clarification

Group D:

1.  What is the difference between a simple and a complex plot?

2.  What can scriptwriters today learn from the opinions of Aristotle?

3.  Definition of the Greek word ‘peripetieia’ – Reversal

Group E:

1.  What is the responsibility of characters in an Aristotelian tragedy?

They support the plot. Their motivation is connected to part of the cause & effect chain.

2.  Aristotle originated the concept of the three act structure. What is it, and how does it apply to scriptwriting?

3.  Definition of anagnorisis?

Discovery of recognition, a hero suddenly becoming aware of a situation.

• stance/gait
• posture
• Attire
• Behaviour
• Characteristic
• Dialogue/speech
• Expression
• Facial features/ physical looks
• Gestures

• Curious vs intrusive

Train yourself to see and record:

• Movements
• Physical characteristics
• Setting
• Adopt a keen eye
• Develop a natural sense of curiousity
• An observed event, when subject to simple questions, can set up a sequence of possibilities that will develop into a story worth telling.
• For example when you observe a couple having a meal yet totally not talking…… what questions come into mind?

• Whom am I writing about?
• Who is my character?
• What is he/she/it like?
• What does he/she/it do?
• What happens to him/her/it in the story?

• People rarely observe familiar people or things closely
• Most people pass through the day with 20%-30% awareness
• Mindless observation vs true observation

• Observe in a conscious way
• Develop the ability to see and record people:
• Their movements
• Their physical characteristics
• The setting/places they’re in

1. Walk into the canteen/library, etc. and watch people pass by. (Fairly crowded.)
2. Eventually, one will catch your attention.
3. Write down as many details as possible through observation.
4. 2 genders
5. 2 different settings
6. 2 different age group
7. Repeat step 1-3 for a second character.
8. Transcribe all these details into the “People-watch” page that you will create on your blog.

-       Serious disagreement

-       Hostile encounter

-       Struggle (mental, emotional and physical)

-       Opposition of persons or forces

-       Can result internally or externally

-       It is the interaction of opposing ideas, interest, or wills that creates the plot

Types of Conflict

-Dramatic conflict is the protagonist’s struggle against something or someone

-man vs man (Troy)

-man vs environment (War of the Worlds)

-man vs system (Children Of Men)

-man against self (7 Pounds)

-Variation of conflict can arise from gender, age, religion and culture.

Causes & Effects of Conflict

-Conflict arises when there is CHANGE

-Changes may be major or minor

-While change is universal and common, it is not always accepted.

Examples of changes:

Seasons, lives, relationships, feelings, bodies, locations, technologies.

-Conflict arises when people resist changes

-The intensity of conflict depends how people react to the change.

-People must earn to cope with change if they want to survive

-The action in a drama depends on conflict.

Importance of Conflict

-Plot cannot be constructed without conflict

-Central feature of the screenplay

-As your characters attempt to reach their goals, they come into conflict with each other.

-The end of the story nears when the protagonist and antagonist approach their goals and he conflict rises to generate maximum suspense and excitement.

Writing for an audience

-Screenwriter=storyteller

-It’s people to people

Writers Purpose

To connect the audiences:

-Themselves

-Their unique vision

The material/Issue

-The drama

-Others

Audiences want to be transported by a screenplay.

Where do you look for a story?

-Within yourself eg. Experiences, memories, emotions

-Practice observing, “listening” and reading body language of people

-Figure how to connect your viewers to your story through emotions, characters, etc.